AMA Update A La Robin

I’ve been saving up a couple AMA updates for you, my faithful readers.  I try to save the most amusing interesting tid bits for you.

__________________________________________

BBC News (5/27) reported, “The number of US adults following a healthy lifestyle has fallen in the last two decades despite increasing public health campaigns.”

Furthermore, the “number of people who exercised 12 times a month or more dropped from 53 to 43 percent,”  And, “the number of people eating five or more servings of fruits and vegetables daily decreased from 42 to 26 percent.”

Why the hell is Britain worried about our health?  Are the British sitting around gloating?

Sir Edmund, munching on a scone, turns to Georgina Wittlesworth. “Well, we might have rotten teeth, but those Americans are a bunch of fatties, eh?”

“Oh, Eddie!” Georgina giggles, reaching for a carrot and dunking it in her sweet tea.  “You’re such a clever man!”  She bites down on the carrot and her tooth falls out.

___________________________________________________

IOM releases updated pregnancy weight gain guidelines: For the majority of women,  “including those who are underweight, normal weight, or even overweight at conception,” the unchanged guidelines still suggest that “women with a healthy body mass index, or BMI…of 18 to 25 are advised to gain 25 to 35 pounds during pregnancy,” while “overweight women with a BMI of 25 to 29.5 should gain less, up to 25 pounds; underweight women, with BMIs below 18.5, should gain more, up to 40 pounds.”

I’d like to translate this for you.  If you’re already a skinny bitch who barely eats lettuce for dinner, pregnancy is great.  Pig out.  Have some cheesecake and wash it down with a milkshake.  If you’re a normal neurotic chick chronically watching your weight like a good doobie, pregnancy is going to suck.  Those urges?  Ignore them.  Ask the skinny bitches to loan you some lettuce, and wash it down with skim milk.

_____________________________________________

The FDA “said Wednesday that it will consider approving Arzerra [ofatumumab], a proposed leukemia treatment that would be marketed by GlaxoSmithKline PLC for patients who have failed treatment with at least two other therapies.”

This is terrific news.  May I offer a suggestion?  Let’s make everyone call it by the chemical name, “ofatumumab”.   Is that not the worst name you’ve ever heard for a medication?  Did someone think that up to be mean?  When the Arzerra patent runs out, we’re all going to have to call the drug “ofatumumab”.  I’m going to really enjoy that.  I might even switch specialties so that I can say “ofatumumab” a lot.

Feel free to ask any medical questions you have.  Hahahaha!  Oh, that was a good one!